Welcome to Smack the Pixie! |
Revised Offer System, `Stick` and `Trap` Offers introduced... Read Blog... |
Smack the Pixie! is an online game that parodies popular
film and television by inviting players to try and outwit
'The Pixie' for the chance
to win up to £250,000! No idea what we`re talking about? Then take a look at the
Rules before going any further... it`s free to
play and there are no catches; except one: it`s only pretend and you don`t actually
win a penny!
So should the fact that you don`t actually win any money discourage you from
playing? Hell no: Recently on Smack the Pixie!, Simon from Worcester desperately needed to
win £50,000 to pay the ransom for his brother, who was being held
captive by Iraqi rebels... Were he to win the £250,000,
Simon said that he would like to bring in Kiefer Sutherland.
In a show that we actually moved forward 12 hours
to accommodate the deadline laid down
by the kidnappers, Simon ultimately realised his dream when he ended up
walking away with a cool pretend £75,000... Not enough for
Kiefer Sutherland, but enough to pay the ransom and buy the celebration
pasties to boot.
What made the show all the more emotional was the
fact that up until the very end
Simon was completely unaware of the fact that he was only playing for
pretend money -
you should have seen his face when we told him!
When faced with so much pretend money and such inspiring success stories,
it`s easy to lose sight of the real prize on offer: by which we mean the
fame and notoriety associated with being
at the top of the prestigious
Smack the Pixie! Leaderboard. When we asked experts to estimate
it`s celebrity value, they hinted at a possible role in
a low-budget British horror movie, or Friday the 13th sequel;
either one of which could possibly involve simulated on-screen sex with
Paris Hilton...
OK so you`re waivering somewhat; but did we mention that Smack the Pixie!
is completely FREE to play??
Completely, absolutely, totally, 100% FREE to play!?
Suddenly it doesn`t seem so bad, does it? Suddenly it all makes sense:
you don`t give us anything, so we don`t give you anything...
All you need to do is
Register to Play, which just means filling out a simple
one-page form - quick, easy and completely painless. Feel free to
Invite Your Friends, too:
Tell them they`ve got to be in it to win it. Tell them it`s a free lunch.
If they tell you there`s
no such thing, render them unconscious with ether
and cannibalise their remains...
Disclaimer:
The previous statement regarding cannibalism was made in jest and should not
be taken literally. Despite the recent trend of people eating people
in certain modern cultures, we at Smack the Pixie! feel that, with the
exception of the rare eventuality that a plane should crash in the Andes,
eating your fellow man is wrong and almost-never justified.
Eating Pixie`s is fine (apparently), so long as you cook them
thoroughly first: Lovely when served with onion, chips, and a side order of
mushy peas; or placed in a bap, smothered with relish, mayo and
coleslaw (`burger`). Pixie`s are also suitable for home freezing,
and at the time of writing are not yet a protected species -
although in the interests of avoiding any potential backlash
from animal rights activists you should probably kill
them first.
Meet the Bankers:
Every night at midnight a new Pixie is chosen at random to act in the capacity
of Banker for the day ahead. Each Pixie has his favourite and least
favourite days of the week, and preferred time of day - both of which
are major factors in determining the Pixie`s mood at any
given time, which in turn influences his fairness and generosity when making
in-game offers... Click on a Pixie above to view his profile. |
