But with that said, let`s introduce you to the crew...

Name: Michael Favourite Day: Tuesday - because his mother always used to make him blueberry pancakes on Tuesday`s Least Favourite Day: Sunday - because Michael and God have never really seen eye to eye Favourite Time: Evening - because of the sense of power and control he feels knowing that the world is asleep and vulnerable Least Favourite Time: Afternoon - because the evening feels so close and yet so very far away About Michael: The notorious masked serial killer, Michael (last name not known), was recently released from prison with a conditional ASBO as part of Labour`s Early Release scheme. Michael, aka `The Staffordshire Stabber`, slaughtered 16 people and 9 monkeys during the late 1990`s, and left a trail of bloodshed up and down the county of Staffordshire when he dragged their bodies from Stoke-On-Trent to Kidderminster, and then back to Stoke-On-Trent. As per the conditions of his release, Michael is forbidden to profit in any way from his crimes, which includes the impending release of his autobiography, 'All The Way Back To Stoke-On-Trent'. He must also attend regular intensive psychotherapy sessions to help ween himself off mass murder. When the cravings strike, Michael often finds comfort in holding a bone from one of his previous victims...